I have a college degree in Human Development and Family Life
But..as with anything, studying and putting it into practice are two different things.
I have learned a few things though
1. The temperature of my marriage affects me daily.
Other than what the scale says...nothing ruins my day like not feeling ok with my husband before we both walk out the door. I don't like to let little things build up into big bricks because too many bricks make a big wall that might be hard to take a part later.
It's not that every issue is always resolved but before we go, if we need to discuss something later, we agree that we are still in love and will talk about it when the time is appropriate.
I can't possibly let him walk away upset or do that to him....
(I mean...what if he dies?...I would feel terrible FOREVER and that would be bad.)
2. Be the first to apologize.
It's more important to me to be happily married than to always be right. Of course, I have to choose my battles wisely because there are times when I need to be heard and understood but that's usually not a question of who's right.
I let little things go and when there are big things... he knows.
There's nothing wrong with taking the high road
I'd rather be happily married than argue about the most efficient way to load the dishwasher.
3. Study your spouse.
The best example I can think of for this was this past Valentine's Day. My husband knows exactly what would make me happy. The chore of making dinner is always a burden to me. He brought home ribs for me, fried chicken for one daughter and pulled pork for the other.
We were in love!
I know what I need to do to show him he's loved and vice versa.
It works.
I love being married.
It's hard but good.
If you think about it...most good things are hard
but SO worth it!
10 comments:
Oh my gosh you are soooo gorgeous! Thank you so much for your comment on my blog, this weekend I am going to email you. Have your daughter email me, I would LOVE to talk to her about my experience here!
You are such a lovely couple! It is wonderful how your husband looks at you in the first picture.
You are so right in everything you said. After a divorce and a very painful separation, I have learned my lesson that talking to each other is key - and not only about money and work but about what really matters between you and him.
And never take your partner for granted but really work hard on your relationship. I am sure this time I do it better :-)
Annette
Lady of Style
Alissa,
Thanks so much for your kind words. I look forward to hearing from you!
Ashley Rane
Great pictures. And really great advice. I think number 2 is the hardest, but definitely important.
Oh my goodness can I just tell you that I am so glad you posted this! This is exactly what I needed to read. That happened this morning and it really does just effect my whole day and just makes me feel a little sick. You're right, there's no use sweating the small stuff. Thank you for your thoughts. Really, thank you!
Talisha,
Sometimes we just need to be reminded, huh?
Glas I could help.
Blessings,
Ashley
What a great and inspirational post. I need to remind myself these types of things more often!
xoxo
Mags
http://magsmind22.blogspot.com
Such good advice! You guys are a really cute couple! I would love if you would write a guest post on my blog? If you are interested please email me. I couldn't find your email to ask you via email but mine is marriedfilingjointly4ever@gmail.com
~Chelsea @ Married Filing Jointly
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